(no subject)

The test was a positive. You tell my family, you die.

(no subject)

Thanks for the kind words, but I have never ever been more absolutely terrified in my life. I've made an appointment at a clinic that the VP of HR recommended. But it's not until the 25th. They'll do the absolute-for-sure test. But I have all the symptoms. I even experienced the break-through bleeding that occurs with implantation (I thought I was starting my period early).

Justin's unhappy and upset. He says we're not ready, mentally or financially. He's right. But I don't think anyone is ever ready. As a matter of fact, I've never been so sure that people only get babies when they come to the conclusion that they aren't ready.

So I'm sorry, but I won't be flying to Seattle in May. I probably won't be visiting for a very long time. But I'd be thrilled if any of you decided to visit me.

I guess from this point on, I'll be talking a lot about baby stuff. I'm going to wait for a couple months before I tell my family, so please keep a lid on it. Both of my sisters lost their first babies and I don't want to have to tell them if I lost mine.